john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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