He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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