Whod you bang
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
We left an ass print on the piano.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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