I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
