Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Randomize
