Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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