she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
Randomize
