Say something about gay babies.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
