i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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