oh good, I think they're gone
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
These People Made Expensive Mistakes That They’ll Regret Forever
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Things The Opposite Sex Just Doesn’t Understand
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...