So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
You coming home soon, man?
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress