With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
my being single is dangerous.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
