Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
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