Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
it was like eating out sand paper
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Randomize
