Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
