Too much gin, very little bucket
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize