Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
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