Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
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