I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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