OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Randomize
