Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
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