Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
