have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Randomize