I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
