yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Randomize
