I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
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We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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