I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
i need an iv and a liver transplant
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
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