careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
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I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
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