This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
You are a genius and a whore.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
