That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
