In the future we'll all be gay
seriously iPhone. stop autocorrecting all my fucks into ducks. you're making all my strong worded texts look harmless and adorable.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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