we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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