1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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