I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
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