I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize