Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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