Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize