Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
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