doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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