Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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