i'm signing you up for texting rehab
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
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