We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
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