Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
