Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize