just come out here and I will go home with you...
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
now i know why i became what i already was.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
