Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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