i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
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