I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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