I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
