I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
he shaved USA in his pubs
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
I would ride that face into the sunset
Randomize
