Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
